That Loving Feeling

Today, during one of my many stints on facebook, I noticed that Lindsey has a first (blind at that!) date with a friend of a friend. She's soo excited and nervous for it. She sent me pictures of him and man I would be too. Total hottie. :) I miss that feeling. The giddy, butterflies in the stomach, can't sit still, can't sleep, nervous, excited, first date feeling. Its been 5 years...FIVE YEARS since i've felt that. Its a one of a kind feeling that every girl knows.

When I met Brad, it was amazing. I was head over heels instantly and that feeling felt like it would never end. You pace the floor for hours before the date starts and you change your clothes a hundred times. Your hearts beating like its going to jump right out of your chest and you can feel it on your lips and hear it in your ears. Such an amazing, treasured feeling.

But for all that, I wouldn't trade a minute of what I have now. Every morning after work, I go home to bed, knowing that without so much as a word, I'll lay down and Brad will roll over, wrap his arm around me, kiss my temple and go back to sleep. Its comfortable. Familiar. Heaven.

At night when he comes home from work, he sits on the loveseat and I sit on the couch. We watch the news and share small conversation about notable things. Its nothing earth shattering. My heart isn't pounding out of my chest, but it definitely belongs to Brad. Sometimes he'll catch me staring at him, and he'll say, "what?" and I just laugh cause I don't know! I just am so in love that it seems like the most natural thing in the world to stare at him for hours on end.

I look at my grandparents, and how they are sooo comfortable together and in sync that there is little need to even talk. I always thought that would be horrible, but the more I think about it, the more I think its everything I want.

So in Love.

So tonight I was sitting at the nurse's station, doing some charting, scoping out facebook, and checking my texts, as drew was giving me updates on how Brad was doing at the races. One of my least favorite things about having a job: missing Brad racing. :( Anyways, drew texted me that he won his heat by a straightaway. Yay! Then an hour later or so, she texts me again telling me Brad won the feature! Double yay!! :) But the next few texts shook my core in a way I'll never forget.

It was kids night at the races and were doing it specifically in memory of kids who have passed away. After brad had won the feature a little boy came over and wanted his picture taken with Brad. Brad obliged and was talking with the little boy. The boy told brad that his twin brother had died of cancer. Brad gave his trophy to the boy, and I'm told that the boy hugged Brad over and over and had the biggest, brightest smile on his face that never ended.

I will never forget this moment. I wish I had been there. I've been in love with Brad Williams since the day I met him. I've always known he was kind and sweet, but I always thought it was a in a subtle, small waves sort of way. He definitely doesn't often let that side show. Brad isn't someone who likes to make a fuss, and even moreso isn't someone who likes people to make a fuss over him.

It makes me fall in love with him all over again when I think of him giving his trophy to that boy. Brad isn't the most romantic, or the sweetest, or definitely the most lovey dovey man I've ever met, but he's definitely one of the most humble and kind hearted. Beneath his gruff, growly exterior beats a warm, loving heart and I'm counting myself truly blessed to be the future Mrs. Brad Williams.

A Picture's Worth a Thousand Words

Okay! Here they are! I'm not sure what I think so don't ask. Or maybe do. Lol I can't really explain it unless you talk to me about it. :) But at any rate, in all our glory, here are our engagement pictures!

Picture Perfect

Brad and I had our engagement pictures taken yesterday. I was soo excited for them I could hardly stand it, and the excitement of waiting for them to come back is JUST as intense! Brad, however, was less than thrilled about the whole ordeal. Our photographer is out of Ames, and is amazing in my opinion. Of course now that we're done, I can think of ideas for poses, but could come up with none at the time. This however, is of little importance, because Caleb was soo creative, we barely had to do anything! Thank god for that! After the first few shots, Brad began to relax a little and as the day progressed, I believe he got a little more into it. Still not overly thrilled, mind you, but his pouty attitude had faded for the most part. :) Caleb will also be doing our wedding photographs in december and I'm super excited for that! Most people probably don't care that much about the photograpy aspect of the wedding, but for me its the most important! Its one of the major tangible memories you have after the day has come and gone! How could you not want the absolute best!?

A Community I Love

One morning I got locked out of my house at 3 AM. Long story. Don't ask. I assure you it is nothing as interesting as it sounds. Brad, as it turns out, is a very heavy sleeper. So, at 3 in the morning I am pounding on the door, calling Brad, ringing the doorbell, and yelling in a whisper for Brad to open the door. Finally, Brad realized I was outside and let me in. No big deal. The next morning, at 6 am, Brad got a phone call from the mailman, asking if Brad and I had broken up. Apparently, the story at Sparky's coffee hour was that Brad and I had gotten into a fight and he had kicked me out. Lol, such is the life in a small town.

Everyone knows everyone's business and if you for one minute think you have any secrets, you are sadly deluded. Everyone knows where you are, what you're doing, who with, and when you'll be back. It's annoying, intrusive, smothering, and all around ridiculous! But I wouldn't trade a minute of it.

At the same time, everyone is there for you in any way you need. Childcare, cup of milk, shoulder to cry on, friendly wave, a lift, help when you're sick.....You name it and in Lytton, IA, if its within anyone's means it'll happen.

Its my favorite thing about living in a small town. When I was at college in Iowa City, I was amazed at how NO ONE on the street smiled or said hello. I knew I was getting close to northwest Iowa because people I would meet on the road would wave. It feels friendly, warm, familiar. Its home. It's about always having someone to share yours joys, yours fears, and failures with. Its never being alone.

I can't imagine it any other way.